Warning: I’m about to get on the soapbox.
I’ve written before about cell phone etiquette, but usually shy away from the topic since I have a tendency to get off on a rant when doing so. This morning, though, two articles—one at The Orion Online about the debate regarding what’s rude and what’s not with cell phone usage, the other a column by StatesmanJournal writer Carol McAlice Currie about cell phone yakkers in the library—caught my eye and got my pulse pumping.
Instead of going on a rant, though, today I’m going to suggest a very straightforward way to determine whether or not its appropriate to talk on a cell phone in any given situation.
At the core of my suggestion is the reason why, I suspect, people get so uptight about cell phone usage. It’s because talking on the cell phone represents something that people have been doing since language first appeared—engaging in a conversation—but in a way that defies established social rules.
So here’s my suggestion: if you are in a situation where you’re uncertain whether or not cell phone usage is appropriate, ask yourself, “Is this an appropriate setting for having a conversation?”
Maybe that sounds overly simplistic, but I suspect it would settle the debate in virtually all cases. Let’s say, for example, that you’re at a theater watching a movie. Would you turn to the person next to you and start having a conversation at any tone above a whisper? Didn’t think so. That means talking on the cell phone, which is just one method of having a conversation, isn’t appropriate either.
Here’s another example: you’re going through the check-out at the grocery store while conversing with a friend, child or spouse. When it comes time to pay, I’m guessing that you pause your conversation so you can interact with the cashier—right? Then you should do the same thing if you’re on a cell phone call; pause the conversation or hang up and call back when you’re done checking out.
Of course, things get more complicated in casual social situations when you’re on the phone with someone and also trying to interact with people who happen to be in your physical presence—such as if you’re riding in the car with friends and get a call from another friend. Is cell phone use appropriate there? I would say it is if you treat the caller temporarily like someone who just walked into the room. You’d greet him or her, say a few words, and then either include that person in the conversation already underway (using speakerphone) or say “Catch you later” and hang up.
Does this make sense? Is there a situation where my (hopefully) commonsense suggestion doesn’t work? Let me know.
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