{"id":5354,"date":"2007-04-05T09:37:04","date_gmt":"2007-04-05T09:37:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/e-commerce\/topfive-does-this-make-me-look-fat.html"},"modified":"2007-04-05T09:37:04","modified_gmt":"2007-04-05T09:37:04","slug":"topfive-does-this-make-me-look-fat","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/personal\/topfive-does-this-make-me-look-fat.html","title":{"rendered":"Topfive: Does This Make Me Look Fat?"},"content":{"rendered":"<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">I have been subscribing to the Top5 comedy list on and off for about 10 years and sometimes the lists are pretty funny. Rarely are they funny and clean enough for me to pass along. Today&rsquo;s list which is a repeat of an old list was worth sharing.<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">It should be noted the lists are never 5 in length and if you want to get these lists e-mailed to you check out <a href=\"http:\/\/www.topfive.com\/\">Topfive.com<\/a>.<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">Today&#8217;s list was originally published on April 8, 2003.<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\"><strong>The Top 16 Poor Responses to the Question<\/strong><\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\"><strong>&quot;Does This Make Me Look Fat?&quot;<\/strong><\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">16 &quot;Not to Stevie Wonder.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">15 &quot;Big time!&nbsp;That&#8217;s why I&#8217;m sleeping with your best friend.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">14 &quot;Does this tie make me look stupid?&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">13 &quot;No way!&nbsp;You look *least* fat in that outfit!&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">12 &quot;I guess there&#8217;s not much point in asking if you mean fat with an &#8216;f&#8217; or phat with a &#8216;ph.&#8217;&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">11 &quot;No hablo ingles.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">10 &quot;Yes, but it also makes you look like a pricey hooker, so things balance out.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">9 &quot;No, but taking it *off* sure does.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">8 &quot;If I answer that question, then the terrorists have won.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">7 &quot;Okay, listen: What&#8217;s important is that you not focus in a negative way on the comparison I am about to make.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">6 &quot;Not if you were traveling at the speed of light.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">5 &quot;Yes, but in my country obesity suggests prosperity.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">4 &quot;Let me jog around to your front and take a look.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">3 &quot;No, honey.&nbsp;But just to be safe, steer clear of one-legged sea captains.&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">2 &quot;Whoa!&nbsp;A talking couch!!&quot;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">and Topfive.com&#8217;s Number 1 Poor Response to the &nbsp;Question &quot;Does This Make Me Look Fat?&quot;&#8230;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">&nbsp;<\/div>\n<div style=\"MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt\">1 &quot;May I consult the Iraqi Minister of Information before answering that?&quot;<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I have been subscribing to the Top5 comedy list on and off for about 10 years and sometimes the lists are pretty funny. Rarely are they funny and clean enough for me to pass along. Today&rsquo;s list which is a repeat of an old list was worth sharing. &nbsp; It should be noted the lists<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":44,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[220],"tags":[],"post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5354"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/44"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5354"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5354\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5354"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5354"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/blog.tmcnet.com\/blog\/rich-tehrani\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5354"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}